Lost for words

Returning to joy from surreal times. Just over six months ago

… the final nail in the coffin of my marriage was hammered. The final embers extinguished with a bucket of freezing water and it literally left me shaking with cold and lost for words.

During the last six months however, like countless others, pictures remained. They were there for me, ARE there for me. Ink on paper, pixels on a screen. Not only from a life lived, photographs already created but the ones I continued to take. For me, for my amazing clients, for meditation.

The camera, the process, the love affair with light remained and still does. Seeing, feeling, creating, recording, connecting and understanding.

As the months passed by, the pain lifted a little, my teeth didn’t grind quite so much and the clock ticked, in a simple second, from 2024 to 2025. My healing stepped another step, my days shone a little brighter and I have begun to feel again.

Gently, lightly. Most often when I have a camera in my hand and another human to engage with. Because connection is everything to me. I didn’t realize quite how much it meant until I lost it all.

The long and short of it is - I LOVE love. I always have. I am a romantic. A dreamer, a believer, a lover and a hopeful human being. No amount of heartache will shake that. Ok, for a short while yes but my core believes in the power of human beings together. Perhaps due to my childhood of dysfunction and a marriage empty of emotion, my inner love warrior has never tired and never stopped her mission.

I believe in wonder, in magic and in joy.

AND I love light and how it is never the same, it never repeats. It is the ultimate known unknown. I understand and relate to light and its ability to shape shift more than anything else.

I had no idea where this post would go when I started it, I just know that sometimes we simply have to begin again. To start the words on the page, to let the light flood back in.

I find the process easy with my camera, I’m practiced. It’s my tool of choice when it comes to expression. It’s my safe space, one that is harder to question by others and easier to enjoy.

Let’s be honest, that is the true beauty of photography, much like music, we can take what we need. We can allow it enough time to settle, it can imprint on our minds if they are open, we can stay a while and journey with it or we can simply allow our eyes to skim the surface of light and colour.

Here’s to unsticking the stuckness, thank you for staying with me,

CW x